The tempo of modern living can seem to play havoc
with our sexual relationships. There are always reasons to put
everything else before our sexual gratification. However, the
choice is yours.
Do you remember the passion and
sexual excitement that got you into the relationship in the
first place? That is what life and living is actually
all about. Temporary diminishment of sexual desire can happen
in any relationship. Illness, relocation, job loss or
financial setbacks, can adversely affect our desire from time
to time. External circumstances can and do affect the fire.
Now a temporary break may actually be a good thing, as this
can lead to renewed discovery of one another. The problem
arises when the situation is prolonged. Now the lack of sexual
desire or activity can actually cause distress in the
relationship and lead to unhappiness in both partners and
breakdowns. This needs to be addressed to avoid causing
irreparable damage destroying the relationship.
Here
are some simple ways to get your mojo working
again.
Stop fighting!
Resolve any issues that
may be stopping you from actually communicating and being a
loving couple. Clear out the trash so to speak. Are there
unresolved issues that you and your partner are avoiding?
Confront these and clear them out. Lingering thoughts will
lead to unhappiness and avoidance of intimacy on all levels.
How do you think you will connect at a physical level, if you
aren't even communicating? Clear the slate so to
speak.
Make intimate contact a necessity.
You
need to prioritize being close, just as an item on your to do
list. pick up the laundry, be intimate, etc. We tend too put
mundane activities ahead of our needs all too often. You need
to live, not just exist. To live, you need to do certain
enjoyable things. Sex is amongst thaoose, so prioritise it
together with other fulfilling activities. Don't just assume
it will happen, make it happen. This need not be inflexible,
but let it happen more often than not. When you push
sex aside your relationship will become like any other
mundane existence. Watch out for this, don't let it happen.
The more you have sex, the more you will want it. Let the
snowball effect carry you in the right direction.
Are
you OK?
Make sure that there aren't any physical
reasons not to have sex. Male impotence, or erectile
dysfunction, is very prevalent amongst highly stressed
breadwinners. Attack the cause, reduce the stress, and if need
be, use some of the available medication and seek medical
assistance. This aspect of your health is as important as any
other for the quality of your life. Women may have discomfort
during intercourse for a variety of reasons. Again, seek
assistance, resolve the physical issues. Make sure that there
are no physical problems. Sometimes hormonal imbalances
occurr, resulting in reduced drive, identify and remedy these.
Modern medicine is very aware and capable of helping in these
situations, there is no need for embarrassment, the issues are
to widespread, for you too think that you are the only one
with this type of problem. Sort it out.
Are you
fulfilled?
A common situation causing disinterest, or
even anger or resentment, is an unfulfilling sexual
relationship. If both partners needs are not being met, one
will always feel like a victim. This cannot enable a mutually
satisfying sexual relationship. If our needs are not being
met, talk to your partner. Work on the situation together. An
understanding of the situation is the first step to resolving
the issue. In many cases, just letting your partner know what
you like is enough to make all the difference. In very few
situations is it impossible to find a mutually acceptable
compromise to satisfy both partners
Where's the
romance?
Romance is what led to sex in the first
place. Setting the right mood, creating romantic surroundings,
can make all the difference. Create a little love nest. This
can be a very intimate place, or an intimate time. Run a bath
for your partner, put up some candles, add some scented
bath oil, and voila you don't know what will happen. On a more
practical note, pack the kids off to grandma for the night,
order in some exotic take-away, put a candle on the table, and
refuse to let her do any housework. Watch the sparks fly.
There are a myriad of ways to alter the mundane, and create
situations that immediately up the chances of a romantic
enjoyable encounter. You just need to do it.
Up for a
dirty weekend?
A change is as good as a holiday they
say. In the romance stakes, a change of scenery can work
wonders. It doesn't have to be an exotic island location
(although that would be nice). Get out of the rut. Get out and
see something different, and it will bring about different
thoughts and attitudes to your sexual perception as
well.
Get wild.
Sex in an elevator, with the
risk of being caught at any time, could turn on some partners
to the extent.
Copyright
Udo Vieth -
http://www.toprelationships.com
